Blessings come in many forms from a good grade on a test to making the team. The problem is that we often teach children how to handle difficulties more than we do how to handle blessings. I think this stems from possibly not knowing how to deal with them ourselves. So, what do we need to help our kids handle blessings?

Humility

This is the obvious one. We don’t want our kids to boast about their accomplishments, yet at the same time, it’s okay to be excited and eager to share the news. To be humble is to be free of pride or arrogance according to Merriam-Webster.

So, the real question is how to teach that? Maybe the best thing is to figure out what pride or arrogance is. The best definition of pride is inordinate self-esteem, again from Merriam-Webster, and arrogance is an attitude of superiority usually manifested by being overbearing.

These are definitely qualities we don’t want our children to have, especially that last. It’s okay to be proud of accomplishments, but to do so without being arrogant.

The next suggests are ways to help keep pride in check.

Acknowledge the source of Blessings

When blessings come our way, we can either say, “Look what I did!” or we can say, “Look what has been handed to me.”

I’m personally going through this right now. Blessed released over two weeks ago. It’s been Amazon’s #1 New Release in at least one category all but one day since it released. I’ve never had a book do this well. I could jump up and down (and I did a little of that) and say, “Wow, I did everything right with this book.” But I know that’s not the case. I’ve done everything right with other books, and they’ve not hit this big. Instead, I’m looking to God and praising Him for blessing me and allowing me to bless others.

Our kids need to be able to realize that blessings come from above.

Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change.

[Jas 1:17 ESV]

This is key to not having an overbearing attitude.

Enjoy the moment

Often in trying to keep bad qualities from exhibiting in our kids, we don’t allow them to celebrate. When the Creator created the universe, he took a day to celebrate and relax. To enjoy His work. The Sabbath was created with this in mind.

Allow your child to celebrate their achievements. Take them out for ice cream. Have a party. Watch a favorite movie together as a family. Have a family fun night. Whatever you decide on, make it something your child enjoys.

Acknowledge others

One big thing for our kids to learn is that they’re not the center of the universe. When blessings come our way, it’s good to be able to acknowledge that there are others around. If your child made the team, it’s possible someone else didn’t. If they got the A on their test, their best friend may have gotten a C or even failed.

Teach your child to reach out in grace and sympathy to those who don’t have blessings and mourn with them. This is key to not losing a friend. By allowing their friend space, they can show that they still care.

Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep.

[Rom 12:15 ESV]

Know blessings are fleeting

Blessings come and go. They’ll be here one moment and gone the next. This is difficult for adults, let alone kids. Teach kids to treasure the blessing while it’s here, but not to hold onto it so tightly that they can’t allow it to pass.

Keep a journal

Journaling your blessings can help when the hard times come. After they’re gone, we easily forget them and begin to complain. Kids especially have a hard time with this. Ever heard, “It’ll never happen to me?” or “Everyone else gets to.”

Provide a journal for your child to record their blessings. It could be as simple as a mini-composition notebook or as elaborate as a leather-bound journal. Then when trials and difficulties come, look back and help them count their blessings.

This habit can not only help with accepting blessings but can even provide better mental health. Right now, that’s something kids need more than ever.

I’m not saying these steps will guarantee your child isn’t arrogant, but they will help train them in the right way. It will help them not be like Hest.

A Bad Example from Hest

Oakwin shook his head as he led his horse to the front of the soldiers’ barracks.

“What?” Hest asked.

“Oh, just how you can be completely blind to your influence on people.”

Hest wanted to ask what his friend meant, but he was starting to feel dumb with all the questions. Oakwin must have sensed it for he answered anyway.

“You go to help the bayheah and come away with a horse for the cannonsea as well. All of that with Clancy not batting an eye.” He shook his head again. “I’m glad you’re my friend. I’d hate to see what it’d be like with you as my enemy.”

“Well, I certainly couldn’t harm you with a sword.”

Hest laughed trying to brush Oakwin’s comments aside. He wasn’t anything special, but a niggling thought or presence in the back of his mind made him wonder.

No, I’m not special. He tried to quiet the voice but to no avail.

You are the first human in over three hundred synods to have befriended an arclukesure, Usheen reminded him.

“Hest, are you going to mount?”

He blinked and discovered he stood before Beskallare. Only his ingrained training kept him from slamming his weight down into the saddle—it wouldn’t be fair to take out his frustration and embarrassment on his horse that way. Instead, the moment he was seated, he turned Beskallare and urged him into a run.

“Hey!”

He heard Oakwin’s cry, but ignored it. Maybe if he let Beskallare run, he could get away from the feeling that something, or someone, had taken control of his life. It was as if the moment Sydur handed Malene those coins, he’d lost all sense of agency, of free will, of choice. The wind brought tears to his eyes, but he only pushed his horse even faster. The ground flew past him in a blur, the only sound the pounding of Beskallare’s hooves as they smacked the earth.

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