So, here’s an excerpt from the early section of the book.

A frosty morning

When Ruskya and Kyn exited the abode the next morning, a heavy fog hung in the air so that the top of the canyon could not be seen. A thick layer of frost crunched under their feet. Each blade of grass seemed to be enlarged three times or more with tiny hairlike particles; it was as if each flake of ice built on the next to create miniature castles.

The riders went about their normal morning chores and training, but over it all hung an air of anticipation for the time when Ruskya would go to Caravan Canyon to meet with Kyle and the woman who wanted to be a dragon rider. Duskya had a bad feeling about the whole thing and tried to talk her brother out of going, but Ruskya was adamant. She opted to follow him with their mental link. Glendyn had decided that he and Kyn would wait at Meredyth’s abode. Her place was the closest to Caravan Canyon they could get without freezing or drawing unnecessary attention. They arrived just before the midday meal.

Meredyth greeted them with hugs. When she heard that Ruskya couldn’t stay but needed to go to Caravan Canyon to meet up with Kyle, she quickly set about making a snack and fixing tea that she poured into a container wrapped with skins to keep it warm. Ruskya thanked her and headed back out into the cold.

The fog had lifted, but still hung from the sky as low clouds. The frost clung to the sagebrush and grass, but the slightest wind would create a small blizzard. The cold sucked the breath away from the young rider, and he drew his furs tighter. He was glad his ma had fixed him some of her tea. He had tucked it and the snack she had given him away under his cloak where they would stay out of the cold.

Ruskya made it to Caravan Canyon in good time. He looked around for the others, but didn’t see them. He wasn’t sure if he was early or not. He waited a few minutes and then heard some voices coming up the canyon toward him. He walked toward them and found Kyle and the woman just arriving from Woolpren.

“You made it here. Good,” Kyle remarked. “I wasn’t sure if you would when I didn’t see you in Woolpren.”

“You said to meet here at the canyon,” Ruskya replied, “so that is what I did. I haven’t been here long.”

“So, where is this dragon rider of yours?” the woman inquired.

“I don’t know,” Kyle said, pulling the hood of his cloak closer around his face, while looking around as if the rider would materialize out of thin air. “He said to be here. He should be here.”

A Dragon Rider Appears

Ruskya decided to watch his companions for signs of anything amiss. Neither of them seemed to have picked up on the presence further out of the canyon. He figured that if he watched Carryl and took his cues from her, he would appear normal. A few minutes later, he noticed a sparkling frost fall upon the edge of the canyon behind them. Ruskya repositioned himself so that he could watch that side of the canyon without appearing to do so. Carryl noticed the shift and looked around. Her sharp eyes picked out the frost shift, also.

“Is someone coming?” she asked.

“Where?” Kyle asked, looking back the way he had come into the canyon.

“I don’t know,” Ruskya answered truthfully. He didn’t know if there was someone with the dragon.

An uneasy silence hung over the group as they watched around the canyon. Ruskya’s dragon senses saw the person first and flared away immediately; this was someone who would recognize dragon senses being used on him. Ruskya knew it was a man and that he was strong. He seemed different from Glendyn or any other rider Ruskya had met or felt. He immediately moved to guard his thoughts and his dragon senses.

“What was that?” Glendyn asked.

“It’s the rider,” Ruskya carefully called. “Do you think he can hear this?”

“No, Ruskya,” Wyeth answered. “No matter how strong, another rider cannot hear a dragon’s communications with his rider. Talk only to me. Glendyn can still watch through your thoughts.”

“Okay,” Ruskya answered shakily.

“Courage, young one,” Wyeth called. With his dragon’s words, Ruskya felt strength return to him as if he had just received dragon courage breathed on him.

“There,” Carryl whispered, “there’s a person coming down the ridge.”

“Where?” Kyle demanded, sounding loud compared to Carryl’s whisper.

Ruskya noticed the look of offense that Carryl sent toward the other man. She almost held him in contempt.

Before she could say anything, Ruskya replied, “She’s right. He blends in with his brown and white outfit, but there is a man coming down.”

The look Carryl sent Ruskya was the exact opposite of what she had thought of Kyle, her green eyes searched him, looking for what he was made of.

“How can you tell it is a male?” she questioned.

Ruskya thought quickly; he had known it from the first contact he had. “I thought I saw his figure as he came around that small bend,” he said truthfully. The glimpse had been enough to confirm what he had known all along. Carryl nodded, satisfied, her hair bouncing like little springs.

They waited in anticipation for the next couple of minutes as the rider made his way down the canyon wall toward them. When he arrived, the rider paused before greeting his perspective riders. Even Kyle had the presence of mind to wait until he was addressed before talking.

Summary

The rider tests them and then when the sun’s all but set they await his decision.

Shocking Ending

The rider waited again. This time no one moved. The fog seemed to creep into their bones. Ruskya felt the touch on his mind again. His mind felt unclean after the rider moved on to the others. He wondered what the rider was searching for.

“I admit, there is only one more test,” the rider said, as the sound of large wings beat in the air.

“You did bring dragons with you,” Carryl said with awe in her voice. No sooner were the words out of her mouth, then an enormous turquoise dragon landed at the rider’s right side.

The dragon’s wings were larger than any Ruskya had ever seen, and the light of the torch made them glow in their iridescence. The dragon folded his wings, and Ruskya noticed the dark veins of blue streaking through the dragon. It reminded him of a large turquoise gemstone set into a cloak clasp or on a belt hook. There was something unnerving about this dragon. The dragon landed and Ruskya had barely taken in all of him, when Ruskya felt Wyeth’s scream of agony.

“Wyeth, are you okay?” he called urgently.

Before Wyeth could respond, Duskya called to him, “Ruskya, is everything okay?”

Ruskya had no time to reply to his twin, for the rider had stepped up to Kyle and with a roar, brought his hand back and slapped Kyle across the face.

“What were you thinking, you imbecile?”

Kyle went down onto his knees at the force and unexpectedness of it.

The rider drew back his hand and smote again. “How dare you bring a rider here!”

Get Dragon’s Future for free

Did you like what you read? You can download your own copy for free or purchase the paperback for a gift for someone who loves dragon books.

Do you love worlds where there are high stakes? Worlds where cultures clash and people have to figure out how to get along? Where love is gentle and comes along slowly?

Then you’ll love Sharon Rose. Whether she’s writing stories in space or a medieval world, she brings all of that together in a masterful story.

Arts of Substance

This unique world has three gifts: Formers, Weavers, and Streamers.

Formers can sense and move the ground. They polish stones, excavate, and build.

Weavers move the wind and can control the weather patterns.

Streamers control the waters.

The gifts are given based not on the person but what Creo deems best for the world, and if someone acts in defiance to him, their gift can be taken away! In a world where status is held based on your gift, that’s not something people are willing to chance.

Book 1: To Form a Passage

The first book introduces us to Dirklan, an underground province that is expanding and bringing ore to the rest of the kingdom until there’s a collapse and the province is cut off from above. Their will to survive is challenged, and politics come to the fore as they seek a passage to reach the world above.

Book 2: To Weave the Wind

Set several generations after the first book, To Weave the Wind gives us a glimpse of the world outside Dirklan and then the problems that have resulted from years of isolation below.

An ambassador is sent from above to Dirklan province, but this ambassador is the daughter of the king and queen. Her gifting has always been valued, and she’s grown up knowing that she’s needed below.

When she arrives, though, she discovers she’s not what the people of Dirklan think she is. They want a streamer to open the waterways that bring in supplies, but she’s a weaver of the wind. What need can there be for wind in an underground world?

To make matters worse, all the eligible bachelors are vying for her hand in marriage. Thankfully, her father gave instructions to the governor of Dirklan that she’s capable of making her own decision.

As the passage that brings food in worsens and political scheming rises, the ambassador and the governor’s son work together with their unique giftings to bring unwanted but much needed help to the province.

Review of To Weave the Wind

Sharon Rose did it again! A story that brings to light the problems that can form when we don’t see things from different perspectives. The age-old struggle of thinking our way is right without bothering to discover that there are other ways of thinking.

Her use of the giftings is masterfully woven to show that each person is unique even if they have the same type of gift–each gift is manifested in a unique way. The whole idea of gifts resonates throughout the story shedding light on our own world.

A must read for those who love fantasy worlds with a touch of realism, characters to love, and books that transport you while they encourage you.

Why me?
Why them?
They’re my best friend, such a wonderful person. They don’t deserve that!

In the midst of tragedy it’s easy to feel overwhelmed and dismayed. Even to blame God. Afterall, he allowed this to happen!

Previous Conclusions to Bad Things

More theological minds than mine have delved into this question and come up with answers. Most of them conclude with set ideas about God.

1. God is all-powerful (omnipotent) and has allowed this to happen. Therefore, he must be a mean God.

2. God is kind and loving and yet these bad things happened. Therefore, he must be a weak God.

Both of these conclusions, lead believers to despair and to turn away from God, for who would want to worship a mean God or a weak God? Not me!

A Trite Reply

Have you ever been through a terrible time and a loving friend says “Romans 8:28, you know.” Or maybe they phrased it like this, “Remember all things work together for good.”

You’re neck deep in tears and struggling to even breathe, and they say that? What good is it?

It doesn’t take into consideration your pain, your struggle. Let alone the fact that your faith may be at its weakest. You may be fumbling to grasp the concept that God is good, that he even loves you! And they say all things work together for good?

It’s about like the scene in The Princess Bride where Miracle Max says, “While you’re at it, why don’t you give me a nice paper cut and pour lemon juice on it?”

A Better Conclusion for Bad Things

While your friend probably wasn’t trying to be trite, what they said was true, they just didn’t dig deeper. The answer to why bad things happen to good people is found in the verse following Romans 8:28.

That’s why we can be so sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good.

God knew what he was doing from the very beginning. He decided from the outset to shape the lives of those who love him along the same lines as the life of his Son.

Romas 8:28-29 MSG

Did you catch the why to our trials and sufferings? To make us into the image of his son! Every single bad thing that happens to me is there to make me more like Jesus!

If you have time, I encourage you to read the full passage from the Message Bible.

Bad Things, Good People, and Resolved

Poor Siobhan. She’s a princess who’s locked into an arranged marriage–one that was arranged without her even knowing! Besides that she’s abducted–not once but twice! This leaves her with PTSD, a husband who knows nothing of statecraft, and then she becomes a mother while her PTSD has been triggered.

If that wasn’t enough, her husband thinks she’s better off without her, leaving her to rule a nation and raise a daughter. At least he left his Captain of the Royal Guard for her.

As her heart heals, she finds she may be able to love again, but war looms over her nation–again her fears haunt her. An evil mage attacks her, and she heads out to battle.

Didn’t she have enough trouble? Why would I put her through all that?

As a discovery author I could say that the story wrote itself, but in reality, my subconscious decided to pen out a treatise on why bad things happen to good people in novel form. I didn’t set out to do so, but that’s what happened.

As you struggle through life’s trials, I hope this will help you. It’s not meant in a trite way. In fact, I’ve been there really questioning whether or not God was good. It was Frank Peretti’s words from Realm Makers 2021 that kept me going. I can still see him on stage as he said:

We’re God’s sheep. He’s the good shepherd. We see his back and his staff and follow him. Rarely does he turn around and say, “Sheep, this is where we’re going, because….” But when he does, listen up! No matter what, follow the staff.

We follow believing that he is good! Just like Aslan, he’s not a tame lion, but he’s good.

As an author there have been several of my novels that were inspired by songs. I hummed the chorus to Who You Say I Am all the while as I wrote Dragon’s Winter. Paskal’s Hope and (working title) The Rebel and His King both are yet-to-be-published novels that were driven by specific songs.

Resolved and Songs

The Sunday before Resolved released, I walked into the church service late because I’d been talking with our Sunday School teacher. I discovered one whole row filled with my family and their significant others, and my parents in the row in front of them. My heart was filled to overflowing as my daughter’s boyfriend stood to offer me his seat. I squeezed in and made room for him as well. Then the music started, and tears streamed down my face. Tears of gratitude and thanksgiving. But with each consecutive song, I was drawn into my own story world. I saw Siobhan in all of it.

Blessed Be Your Name by Matt Redman

The premise of this song is that through good and bad I’ll praise God. Part of the tears flowing with this song was because I remembered another time when I’d lost a friend in death. We’d sang the very same song. Now I sat in a row full of family and all was well.

The chorus states:

Every blessing You pour out, I’ll
Turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name

This reminded me of Siobhan at the end of Resolved. The final chapter came to mind and I cried even more.

The Goodness of God by Bethel Music

This song will probably inspire another novel or more. The lyrics are just so amazing. The chorus talks about God’s goodness running after me. Just the imagery of that blows my mind away, but that Sunday, it was again the final chapter of Resolved that played out on my mind’s eye.

You have led me through the fire
In the darkest night
You are close like no other
I’ve known You as a Father
I’ve known You as a Friend
And I have lived in the goodness of God

Exchange the word God for Jeeah, and that’s exactly what Siobhan was saying as well.

How Great is Our God by Chris Tomlin

I love this song and usually sing it in three different languages. In fact, that Sunday I did. My daughter’s boyfriend looked at me strangely at first, but when I explained that I was using American Sign Language and singing in Spanish on the chorus, he smiled.

This song is just a wonderful song to raise in praise. To realize how wonderful God is. I envisioned Siobhan standing on the field singing this one to Jeeah.

The Door Within

Meanwhile, I’ve been listening to Wayne Thomas Batson’s The Door Within Trilogy. Books 2 and 3 were bookcased around Realm Makers–listening on the five hour trip to the airport and back, and finishing when I was down sick with a cold after the conference.

The trilogy is an amazing Christian fantasy that in some ways is like a modern-day Pilgrim’s Progress. Teens find their way into the land of Alleble full of Glimpses (spirit halves of the people from earth), and a fight between King Eliam and Prince Paragor. The story dropped me into the world of Glimpse-kind and knights of Alleble to such a degree, that when I went to church to set up the PowerPoint for Sunday, I was transported to King Eliam’s throne room with each of these songs:

Hosanna (Praise is Rising)
All Hail, King Jesus
Ancient of Days
He is Exalted
You Are My King (Amazing Love)
Come, Let Us Worship and Bow Down
Majesty
Holy Is the Lord

What songs have reminded you of books? Or are there books that remind you of songs? I’d love to hear your thoughts.

Mairead’s Longing for a Father

“Momma, who’s my father?”

Siobhan sucked in air as if a bandage had been ripped from a wound. Even after eight synods, the question hurt.

“’Tis a story for another step, Inene.”

The girl’s expressive eyes clouded over. “Ana says he was someone very special. Is that true?”

“Aye, ‘tis true.”

“Then why won’t you tell me?”

With a sigh Siobhan place a finger on Mairead’s nose. “Remember how you ask for a story before going to bed each step?”

Mairead nodded, her dark braids bouncing.

“And remember what ‘twas like when Rydian told you a story that was too scary and you had bad dreams?”

Again, the braids bobbed. “Is the story of my father scary?” Her eyes widened.

“Let’s just say there are aspects of it that you’re not quite ready for at eight synods.”

“When I’m at nine?” Siobhan stood with a smile. “Mayhap.”

Girls and Fathers in School

Last year particularly, I saw the need for fathers in the lives of girl teens. There was one in particular who sought attention–often to her own detriment. As I got to know her, I learned that she didn’t have a good dad in her life. In fact, he’d harmed her when she was younger.

Another girl in the same class didn’t have a good mom, but her relationship with her father was rock solid. This girl still had self-assurance issues, but she was more confident and didn’t need attention like the other.

What Your Daughter Needs

There are several things that daughters need from fathers. Often these are things that their dads do automatically.

Unconditional Love

Daughters from the time they’re born need your love–unconditionally. That means they know that no matter what they do, you’ll be there for them, accepting and loving them.

Is it easy? No. There will be times, especially in their teen years when they’ll not be very lovable. They’ll say things: “You hate me!” “That’s not fair!”

Stand your ground. Show them by your actions that they are still loved.

Time

Time is one of the most precious gifts ever. We only have 24 hours in any given day, and it goes away so quickly. Just think how long ago your daughter was a baby and now she’s in elementary school.

In our world of constant activity, it’s more difficult than ever to spend time with your daughter, but it’s most important. This isn’t time where you’re both staring at your phones. This is real time, learning to understand her and what she likes. It may involve a phone, but have it be hers and she’s showing you things on it.

Listening Ear

Listening is difficult. Well, active listening.

This isn’t the type where you nod and smile while thinking about what you’re going to say. It’s truly pausing and hearing what she’s saying.

Dates

In a world where there is no moral compass, and few examples of healthy relationships, your daughter needs you to step up and teach her. There’s no better way than by your actions.

If you want your daughter to know how a gentleman should treat her, then demonstrate it from early on. Take your daughter on dates. Set the example of the type of person you want her to be around later. She’ll pick up from those cues.

Date Ideas

• her favorite restaurant
• bookstore
• movie
• trip to the park
• sports outing
• garage sale shopping
• shopping
• whatever she likes to do

Dates can be simple, or elaborate. Make them special and have them regularly.

Love Her Mom

The best assurance you can give your children is that the two of you love each other. This is also another way of setting the bar high for that future partner that will come into your daughter’s life.

Dads play a major roll in the lives of their daughters. So many fathers are missing from modern books–including fantasy. This is very sad, but it also shows the trend in real life. Will you step up and change a generation? Will you provide an example of love to your daughter?

Fantasy

Of course, fantasy is the largest section this year with several of them being books that had been on my to-be-read list for many years and one a book that I didn’t realize had more in the series. I’ve divided the fantasy books by whether or not the author is part of Realm Makers.

Non-Realm Maker books

1. Ranger of Kings by C. J. R. Isely was very similar to Uprooted. I enjoyed it but not enough to continue on to book 2.
2. Blood and Loyalty by Luna Fox has appeared at the top of the lists that Uprooted, Blessed, and Exalted have been on this year. I enjoyed it but wasn’t expecting it to be a novella.
3. Heart of Hope and Fear by C. S. Johnson has been on my to-be-read list waiting (not too patiently) for it to release. It finally came out this year and I was able to read it. It was the perfect ending to the trilogy!
4. Chronicles of Narnia–Okay, this isn’t a single book, but I discovered I was reading them one per day and almost made it seem like one book. I didn’t get to read The Magician’s Nephew because I’d leant it to a student who never returned it. I picked them up after reading the next book on the list which I really wasn’t sure what category to put it in.
5. Once Upon a Wardrobe by Patti Callahan This wonderful read was worth purchasing in paperback form, and I’d even go as far as to say hardback would be worth it. It really was the first book that I went around telling everyone they should read it. It’s a historical fiction about a young boy in the mid 1950’s and his sister who’s attending university. When he gets a book from his aunt to help him wile away his time in bed since he’s sick, he falls in love with the book, but when he discovers the author teaches at his sister’s university, he begs her to ask the author where Narnia came from. The tale unfolds reliving C. S. Lewis’s life along with the story of the sick boy and his sister. An excellent read!
6. Dragon Rider: The Griffin’s Feather by Cornelia Funke was a delightful discovery. I didn’t know there were more in this world. In fact, book 3 just recently released. It’ll probably be my Christmas present to myself. I purchased The Griffin’s Feather in paperback and loved it! Sometimes with sequels you lose your favorite characters or the action isn’t as good as the first book. None of that was true with this book. I was able to still have my favorite characters discovering new characters and risking their lives to help save mythical creatures. A win-win!

Realm Maker books

1. The Risen Age Archive trilogy consists of Curse Bearer, Blade Bearer, and Rune Bearer by Rebbeca P. Minor. I read all three books within a week or so of each other. They were a fun epic fantasy world adventure with a hint of romance and life and family on the line.
2. Wayne Thomas Batson books: The Myridian Constellation is clean, epic fantasy at its finest. I aspire to write like this. I’d listened to the first three books on audio last year, and when book four was announced as on pre-order with a special short story if you ordered, I debated, but I wanted to finish out the six books with the narrator, Dave Cruse. He does a phenomenal job of recreating the characters. In fact, there’s one that I don’t want to meet in a dark alley, let alone his bone chapel!
   The Misadventures of Strylum and Xerk is a novella origins story in the same world. I also was able to listen to the short story that was available with the pre-order.
3. H. L. Burke’s Superheroes: Power Up and Power Play take the Supervillain Rehabilitation Project to young adult readers. We’re introduced to Prism’s camp for troubled teens and meet the three teens. The first book, Power On, let’s you see all the teens and get into their heads. From there, each book focuses on a specific teen. Power Play blends LitRPG with superheroes when a new girl’s power traps the teens inside a Dungeons and Dragons style game. If you like Marvel, you’ll love H. L.’s superheroes. Power On even won a Realm Award!
4. The Lost Stones of Argonia by Dawn Shipman captured my attention and pulled me in. I read book 2 as an advanced copy and then went back and purchased book 1. I had to know what happened and how she’d gotten to the point she was at in book 2. To make things even better, I was able to cheer Kingdom Lost on when it was in the running for a Realm Award.
5. A Castle from Ashes by Sharon Stone was the last of the Castle in the Wilde series I’d read last year. I loved that world of non-magical fantasy. The characters drew me in, and I wanted to know what happened to them.
6. When Your Dragon is Too Big for a Bath by C. E. White is a fun children’s book to help kids understand prayer.
7. The Case of the Missing Robot by Laura Zimmerman is an enchanting mystery for middle grade readers. It engaged and pulled me into the story.
8. The Shallows series by Denver Evans is one of those stories that I read book 1 several years ago and never could find the rest in the trilogy until around Black Friday when I learned that Denver Evans runs the Black Friday sale I’m in every year. I immediately picked up Phantoms and Legends and read them. This Irish-inspired island world with magic and inventions and sailing ships kept me on the edge of my seat. It’s a must read, and I’ll reread it as well.

Sci-fi

What Sci-fi isn’t complete without Timothy Zahn. If you know me, you know I love his books. I’ve recommended them before and will probably continue to recommend them. This list contains one trilogy and a sequel to one of my favorite books by him. It also has some new names.

1. The Icarus Plot by Timothy Zahn is a sequel to my favorite books by Mr. Zahn, The Icarus Hunt. This story picks up several years after the close of book 1 and is designed for those who’ve not read the first book to be able to read. These two will sit at the top of my favorite books by Timothy Zahn.
2. Star Wars: Thrawn Ascendency is a trilogy that is well worth listening to or reading. I used it as my to work and back story for the first part of this school year. I love Thrawn and how he thinks. Even in the early books, I enjoyed him. Here learning about his back story, it’s even better.
3. Gemini’s Key by H. Halverstadt released the same time Blessed did. We had a joint release party at Realm Makers, but unfortunately H. Halverstadt couldn’t make it, but I read the book on the plane trip home and loved it! If you love space romps, you’ll enjoy this one.
4. Amish Vampires in Space by Kerry Nietz Yes, you read that correctly. The story is that someone presented this title as a joke at a conference, then Kerry thought about it, came up with a plausible plot, and ran with it. It is a traditional Amish story only they start with a colony in space. When Jedidiah’s family secret gets out, the whole colony is forced to flee to the stars where adventure and all kinds of temptation await. I listened to the audio and thoroughly enjoyed it.

Non-fiction Books

I did read Madeleine L’Engle’s Walking on Water as well as a couple other non-fiction books this year.

1. Walking on Water by Madeleine L’Engle was worth the read. It gave insight into being an artist as well as a Christian.
2. Bird by Bird by Anne Lamont was recommended to me before the end of last school year by my son’s girlfriend. I figured if she reached out and shared a book with me, I’d better read it. I have marked it up with all kinds of things that struck me. It’s designed for writers, but it also helps you figure out life. On one particularly rough day last spring, I did as Anne Lamont suggested and started to write what I was feeling. It was freeing and now I have that for later years to look back on.
3. Prayer: How Praying Together Shapes the Church by John Onwuchekwa was a book handed out at church. I used it as a way of starting my day. It was a challenging and thought-provoking look at prayer and the church.
4. I read Crooked Lines: A Single Mom’s Jewish Journey by Jenna Zark as a favor to the author. I wasn’t sure what to expect and so didn’t go in with much expectations other than I’d loved Jenna Zark’s The Beat on Ruby’s Street. The same writing skills come out in this essay-based journey. The first night, I’d been slapped with yet another loss in 2022 and needed hope. I was reminded that God’s mercies are new every morning! From there on, I continued to read, enjoying the similarities between this Jewish mom and me.

My 2022 didn’t end up like I expected, but I had some great books to carry me through. What’s on your book list for 2023? Any that I should add to my to-be-read list? Did you gain some books to put on your to-be-read list? I hope so.

So how do you enjoy the holiday season while grieving? I’m walking through this year’s Christmas season reading my own notes and reminding myself how to do this. I did the count, and as of Friday, December 9^th, I’ve had to say good-bye to 16 people since February, 2020! Some were close acquaintances, some long-time friends, and others family. That’s a lot of grief! I hope that what I’ve learned will help you.

Remove the mask that everything is fine

Often, we run around purchasing gifts, attending the parties, and we play into the lie that all’s well when it isn’t. Take off the mask. Okay, be a bit choosy about who you’ll share with, but don’t always answer, “Fine” when it’s not.

I’ve taken to saying, “I’m here,” or “Yeah,” which doesn’t really answer how are you. With other closer friends, I shake my head and say, “Not well.” It’s been freeing, and I’ve received a lot of hugs.

It’s okay not to be okay

After removing the mask, now you have people looking at you like you’re raining on their parade. Here on the Southern Oregon Coast, we have a Christmas light parade the second weekend in December. This is the Oregon Coast where instead of snow we get wind and rain! There’s a reason I created a character who was afraid of the wind. Yet, we have a parade in the middle of winter when it’s more likely than not to have rain.

So, acknowledge it’s okay not to be okay. Earlier this month, during a student meeting, I had a student admit she was struggling with suicide and self-harm. At the time, my youngest had just moved out to his first apartment on his own, and I’d been shocked with the death of two friends and an acquaintance, and was trying to deal with my dad’s health issues. After the meeting, I gave the student a hug and told her that it’s okay not to be okay. Together we cried.

It’s amazing the freedom this gives you.

Recognize the big ball and the button

This concept was given to me by a parent. She said that grief is like a ball in a box inside you. Inside the box is a button. When the loss is brand-new, the ball is huge. It doesn’t take much to jostle it around and bump the button. When it hits the button, it hurts like crazy! As time progresses and you deal with your grief, the ball shrinks. It still bumps against the button with painful results, but not as frequently.

What I’ve learned is that the ball of grief can fluctuate in size as more losses build. For instance, as I’ve dealt with the grief from 2021, I thought I was fine, but then in November, I experienced another three losses and a fourth in December. The ball just got bigger again.

Understanding this concept helps you to give yourself grace. Accepting that you may cry, and it’s okay to.

Cherish the memories

As you walk through this time, cherish the memories you made. Christmas often is bittersweet for me because my grandpa would sing “Oh, Holy Night” every year. He’s not been here for the past 22 years to sing it. Each year, at some point in time, I’ll cry when I hear the song.

Memories are what keep the person alive. What better time than Christmas and the holiday season to remember your loved one and the special memories you made with them.

Find a friend

The best way to go through this is with someone who understands. It may only be one person that you talk with each day, or it may be multiple people that you connect with through different places. For instance, one person at work, one at home, and maybe another at church.

Grief is a process

As you deal with the ball in the box, realize that it’s a process. Not everyone will go through it the same. My husband has only cried a few times since his dad passed away in June, where I’ve cried multiple times. Instead, my husband thinks he’s dealing with the grief with physical symptoms.

You’ll go through cycles, and not every cycle will make sense. That’s okay. Adjust to the new normal on a day-to-day basis.

Make new traditions

Lastly, try to find new traditions for this time of the year. Things that you can do with family or on your own. I’m considering gingerbread designs. I’m not sure if it’ll work or if I’ll have the energy for it, but the more the idea persists, the more I’m encouraged to try it.

What’s a tradition you can create? There are all kinds of special recipes out there. Maybe ornament making would be up your aisle. My mom would create an ornament to commemorate the year. Maybe it’d be watching a special movie. Whatever you decide, make it yours.

As you walk through this holiday season, may you be able to be real and true. May you feel comfort and be able to heal.

Our Protagonists Meet in a Medieval Market by Kandi J Wyatt and Phyllis Wheeler

Hest wandered into the market place where bobbles and trinkets met his gaze. He stared in wonder at the intricate cogs and wheels. How were they made? With a shake of his head, he glanced over at the person standing next to him and gaped. A silver-haired young man with muscles larger than any knight he’d ever seen strode beside him. Silver orbed eyes blinked back at him as the man cocked his head.

Heart of my hearts? Usheen’s voice filtered through his mind.

Where was the dragon? Hadn’t they been flying over Muintir? Gripping his sword at his side, Hest felt the bond’s magic flow through his muscles.

“Hush, ‘tis I,” The silver-haired youth said, bringing a hand to his mouth as if to confirm he’d spoken.

Hest blinked. “Usheen?”

His companion nodded, not daring to open his mouth again, but he trailed a talon-like fingernail over dark lines on his hand that looked suspiciously like someone had drawn scales there. Hest wondered if that’s what he looked like when he gave into the bond, but no one had ever said he had silver hair.

The two stared at each other until someone bumped into them.

“Watch where you’re standin’!” The man grumbled. “Most people keep to the sides if they’re goin’ to gawk.”

“Ah, my pardon,” Hest nodded to the man, gazing around for his personal guards, only to find none. Goshkeah would be furious that they’d been separated.

With a courtly bow, Hest moved to the nearest booth, Usheen trailing after. Hest couldn’t help but double check to be sure the dragon had no tail dragging behind him.

Jake and Ava

At the other side of the market, voices called out, hawked wares, scolded, spoke in admiring tones, and generally sounded like background babble to Jake and Ava’s ears. Seasoned time-travelers from 2020s America, the eleven-year-old twins started at one end of the market and wandered toward the middle, noting the cinnamon, cloves, and body odor flavoring the air.

A group of soldiers in clinking chain mail, wearing swords, marched by. A robed merchant seemed to ignore the soldiers. Or did he? Ava thought he flinched.

Jake zeroed in on a long-haired dog that lay next to a rug seller, pillowed on his own colorful soft rug. Jake knelt to make friends.

Across from the rug merchant, Ava found a house of puzzles–jigsawed figures, made of colored wood.   A star in three dimensions begged her to pull it apart. But when she tried, the puzzle merchant frowned at her, his gray beard nearly covering his downturned mouth. 

A Magical Song

The next booth was a gadget shop, full of boxes of gears and cranks. What could this dark blue metal box do? She paused. A yellow button poked out of it, inviting touch. When she picked the box up, a soft melody drew her in.

Jake stood up from the dog and came over to listen. “I know that song,” he said. “Don’t I?”

Hest and Usheen were both drawn into the stall. That music! Hest hummed along. It couldn’t be.

“’Tis the swantry,” Usheen said, his voice quiet and awed. He reached out a hand toward the box.

“Wait!” said Ava, and Usheen flinched away, the spell broken.

Trouble

“Push it!” said Jake. He reached over and pushed the button.

A stench filled the air.  The four of them backed away.

Hest glanced about and took in the situation. They were in a foreign city without his personal guard. There was no time for diplomatic measures.

“They’ll be coming for us soon,” he said, gesturing toward the long-haired gadget merchant.

The man was trotting away down the alley flapping his arms and crying, “Help! Help!”

“Usheen, create a distraction!” Hest glanced about for inspiration and saw a banner flapping in the distance. “The city gate ‘twill be our best chance. Meet there.”

City Gate

Usheen, though in human form, had not lost his dragon roar. He launched himself through the crowd letting out a bellow that made people cover their ears. Surely the soldiers would follow him, looking for a dragon, but not finding one.

After ten minutes, the four of them met up outside the city gate.

“Please explain what we’re doing here in this market.” Hest took in the two younger ones, while Usheen tried his best to glare at them. But a cocky smile spread across his face.

“I guess we’re all keeping my brother out of trouble,” said Ava, poking Jake with her elbow.

“Sorry,” he said. He ducked his head.

So, what did you think? Would Usheen make a great human? What would you have looked at in the market?

Remember, there’s one more day to enter the giveaway in celebration of the release of both Exalted and The Dog Snatcher.

1. Choose your location based on your family’s interests.

Home away from home at Jackson Wellsprings

For our family, we love returning to Jackson Wellsprings in Ashland, Oregon. It’s a place that has reasonable camping, electricity if you need it, WiFi, and a wonderful pool fed by a hot spring. We first found the spot twenty-five years ago in August wen my husband and I were on our honeymoon. Being young college students, we didn’t have a ton of money to spend so the hot spring was the perfect location for one of our stops on our way back to school. Since then, we’ve camped there on numerous times with the kids when we’ve gone to see the Shakespearean Festival. Several years ago as I finished up my master’s program, I had classes in Ashland for five weeks. Jackson Wellspring became my home away from home from Monday through Thursday. I took the kids, and we enjoyed the pool, WiFi (to keep in contact with home), and Ashland together.

So, whether your family likes swimming, hiking, kayaking, woods, rivers, or cabins, look for a place that has something everyone will enjoy. That way, you won’t be hearing, “Mom, I’m bored!”

2. Do research before staying.

Last summer, my nineteen-year-old and I traveled back to the Mid-west to see my family. We camped along the way; so I researched the first two spots on our journey. Those few minutes on the internet saved us time and gave us a pleasant experience–nice grass, inexpensive places to stay, and hot showers. However, if I would have researched the return trip, it would have been better. Our night’s stay in Grand Teton’s could have been less stressful, instead of not knowing if we were going to have to sleep in our car! (You can read about it in my blog post.)

Years ago, my husband and I made that same trip and camped along the way. Some research would have saved us on two different occasions. The first our campground really was an RV campground with no tenting spots, and we ended up sleeping on rocks. Another spot had a great location, but we didn’t check the weather out. Our poor little six-month-old who never could keep blankets over him when he slept, stayed under the sleeping bag and woke up with blue lips!

3. Plan your menu accordingly.

When camping, you not only have to pack your sleeping gear, but your food and food equipment. Make sure you plan so you can enjoy your time as well. We’ve had several camping events that I forgot to pack food that was easy to snack on or that would help me deal with heat. I remember one memorable event where I ended up in a friend’s tent laying down eating cheese and crackers and drinking water because I had overheated and ended up with a hypoglycemic crash.

Camping can be fun, but if you’re left washing up dishes or with dried on food when you return, it can ruin the fun. Some simple planning can help. Choose foods that are easy to clean up and disposable. Our go to for camping events are cup of noodles, instant oatmeal, and sandwiches with chips. However, if you have the whole portable kitchen, there’s nothing better than the smell of eggs and bacon mixed with the scent of the great outdoors.

Take into consideration your activities you’ll be doing. The one year, my teenagers went on a hiking camping trip up the Rogue River. I packed lightweight food for them like we would take to our medieval events. What I didn’t plan for was their activities. The cup of noodles and instant oatmeal didn’t fuel their bodies enough.

4. Pack according to your family needs.

Yep, having a checklist of what all you need is very helpful. I’ve found I usually divide my list into kitchen, food, clothes, and bedding. It’s no fun to show up at a campsite and not have a pillow or enough blankets to stay warm. Don’t believe me? Just ask my fifteen-year-old. Be specific with your checklist and take into account the type of campsite you’ll have. One time, I packed everything for pancakes the next morning, including the electric skillet. However, when we arrived at our site, there was no electricity to be had. Thankfully, I have a MacGyver for a husband. He rigged two pop cans into a skillet over a fire. Download a printable camping checklist and one to hand to your child for packing.

5. Remember the point of camping.

Whether you’re camping in a cabin by the lake, in a yurt on the ocean, or under the stars in your own backyard, the reason we camp is to spend time with family. Make sure to put the electronic devices away and enjoy the great outdoors. I know I touted Jackson Wellsprings for their WiFi, but the point of that was for certain hours a day, I could work on my homework, and we could Skype home instead of paying for a phone call. If everyone’s engrossed in their own devices, then we’re not building memories together nor are we doing anything differently than what we could do at home. We might as well be in the house instead of camping.

Did I leave any special tips out? Let me know in the comments. You can download a printable checklist for your next camping trip as well as a kid friendly packing list, and you can save this “Don’t Leave Home Without” list.

In 2016, I wasn’t going to make a resolution, but in one of my Facebook groups, a post asked how many books we’d read in 2016. I thought long and hard about it. With writing, editing, and publishing three books, teaching, assisting a photographer, and mothering I didn’t think I would realistically read many books. I decided to be optimistic though and said I’d read 20. To my utter amazement, I read at least 23! I tried to count them up, but I couldn’t remember when I read five others. So, I didn’t add those five to the number read.

This little girl has some wonderful things to say about resolutions.

Statistics show that only 8% of people who make resolutions are successful! However your age could either help or hinder you. Statistic Brain says that 39% of people in their twenties are successful each year at keeping their resolution and only 14% of people over 50. So, how can you keep your New Year resolution? Here are some helpful hints.

#tips for keeping your New Year’s Resolution. #momlife

Tweet This

1. Keep it Simple!

As I tell my students if it’s not simple, you’ll not follow through. If my reading goal would have been to read paperback or hardback books, it wouldn’t have happened last year. I read two in paperback format. Instead, the majority of the books I read were in digital format. While four were audio. It was possible to read from my computer on my lunch break.

For you, you might make your goal and break it down into simple steps. Don’t make things more complicated than they need to be. That’s when we don’t follow through. If I had a goal to lose weight and my method was to go to the gym every day, I know that would not work. My schedule is too hetic and eratic to do that, but if I wanted to do sit ups before going to bed or when I got up in the morning, that would be feasible.

2. Keep Your Resolutions Realistic!

My book reading goal was realistic but challenging. If I said I’d read 36 books that would have been crazy with the rest of my schedule. I couldn’t read three books a month!

Whatever you want to do this year, make your goal achievable by making it fit you. Yes, you want to push yourself, but you also want to make it doable. Remember there are two ways to look at this–you could be overachieving and not realistic or you could be underachieving and not pushing yourself. Find that happy balance.

The greater danger for most of us lies not in setting our aim too high and falling short; but in setting our aim too low, and achieving our mark.
~Michelangelo

3. Don’t Make a Resolution You Can’t Keep!

How many times have we been at an event or hearing a motivational speaker and the emotion of the moment rouses us to jump on board and make a commitment that later we realize we can’t keep? This holds true for new year’s resolutions as well as for everyday promises.

Be careful that what you commit to do is actually within your power to do. The riders of Dragon Courage have a saying: Do not swear to something you cannot keep. It’s a way of making sure that their words are accurate. It also enables them to keep their promises better.

4. Have an Accountability Partner!

Having someone to walk with you through your commitment really helps. Several years ago my Weight Watchers group decided to do a 5K run. Now, ever since grade school I’ve hated running. I can’t get my breath and get that stitch in my side. However, since the group was going to run, I decided I could slowly build up to running. I had the group, but I wasn’t able to run when the group ran. So, I set a date when I’d run with the family. We set a course that would be equivalent to 5K, and then I started to train.

Getting up at 5:00 in the morning wasn’t easy. I didn’t have a physical partner to train with me, but a friend I knew was in Africa at the time. She wrote a blog post about running a half-marathon up Mt. Kilimanjaro. She shared the motivational music that kept her going when she realized that half of the marathon was up-hill! She ran to the beat of Shakira’s This Time for Africa. My accountability partner became that song. If my friend couldn’t be with me in person, in spirit any time I heard that song, she was there.

In the Dragon Courage series, the riders swear by their dragons. By so doing, their dragon becomes their accountability partner. The dragon can hold them responsible. The same is true of our commitments. We need someone to walk with us and keep us accountable.

“I vow it. Upon Wyden, my dragon, I will do all in my power to train your children to be the best dragon riders they can be. They will bring honor to the memory of their father.”              ~Glendyn in Dragon’s Future

So, what’s your new year’s resolution? What can I hold you accountable for? Whether you realize it or not, you hold me accountable to writing a blog every week and to continue publishing books. If it wasn’t for you my reader, I wouldn’t be taking time to write. Sure, some of the stories would be written because the characters scream loudly enough in my head to tell their tales, but without a reason to write, it isn’t worth taking the time from my already busy life. So, thank you for being there.