Inside the mind of a Mom

This year has been an interesting year. I had two seniors in high school who graduated the same day from two different high schools fifty minutes away from each other. I also published my first book. As the summer wound down, my emotions became more fragile. Any mention of the empty nest or sending children off to college struck home. I knew I would soon have only one child in the house after having four for the last year.

Today, my eighteen year old received his acceptance papers to a one year Bible College five hours away. He will be leaving the first of October. I was excited for him, but then realized that my little boy was growing up.

My nineteen year old has decided to go to the local community college. She will stay at home for the first term. Even though she is at home, between a night job and classes, we won’t see her much. Again, I am glad for her, but sad that my little girl is growing up. Tonight she realized that our youngest will be in high school next year.

Where has the time gone? Wasn’t it just a year ago that they were the ‘twins’, the one only 17 months old feeding the one month old? It goes by in a blink of an eye.

With this realization, the other happening today weighs heavy on my heart. One of my uncles passed away. I barely knew him because of where we lived, but I remember my cousin with fondness. She lost her mom, my aunt, just a few months ago and now her dad. This leaves my dad and his younger brothers as the patriarchs in the family. The realization that Dad is the oldest of his family now is sobering. I know too soon life will cycle through. I don’t want to think that way, but watching my kids grow up makes me realize that in time I will be the grandma. It will be my job to hold the family reunions and keep us together just as my grandma did before me.

Tonight, I can curl up and cry, but tomorrow I will be the strong mom ready to face the future with my kids. I’ll be prepared to encourage and cheer them on. I’ll brag about their college plans and be proud of what they have done. For this is what a mom does. She takes life, cries, laughs, and beams with joy.

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